Every Day

You'll forgive me if I take this moment to suggest that every day should be Mother's Day. And Father's Day. And respect-and-love-for-your-family-and-those-who-mentor-and-support-and-care-and-love-you day. Every. Day.

You'll forgive me if I don't write a post about how difficult this day is going to be.
Because it won't actually be any more or less difficult than any of the 148 days that have come before today. It won't even be more difficult than last year, which I spent, as usual, at Sunday School. While Sam was in the hospital. It just....won't. At least I hope not.

In 2009, I made a note on my own blog to write a post about how I felt about Mother's Day and Father's Day...about how much I love my parents and how little I need a holiday to remind me about it. About how much I know that I am loved by my children and my husband and my family and how I am not fooled by the commercials and the need for it all to remind me that my mothering is something of which I am proud...and I don't need one day to be reminded, one day to make them stand up and say nice things, one day to lift me up....I am good with that stuff every day, thankyouverymuch. About how many different kinds of people it takes in one's life to help, to nurture, to create growth and to raise us up -- parents are an important part, but not the only part. About the light that shines within each of us and inspires others....and how that is a kind of parenting too.

Growing up, we didn't make a huge deal of these days. Always a pragmatist, when reminded that I should appreciate my parents all the time, I quickly saw through the made-up-holiday, kissed my parents and wished them happiness on these days and every day, and continued on.

And in my world, I know, oh so very well, that Mother's Day causes pain. So much pain and heartache for so many. This focus on one day, one day that seems so innocuous (everyone has a mother, right? Wrong, people.) but really isn't when you begin to peel back the layers and the hurts and the reality of reality...and my heart has always ached on this day for those for whom this day is just plain hard because of....fill-in-the-anguish. (And this year, I've so appreciated that more than ever, there have been gentle reminders written, reminders that I didn't even need to write, reminders that have, I hoped, helped everyone to exist in a state of awareness and empathy....)

So on this day, this day-that-is-hard-because-every-day-is-hard, be gentle to everyone you meet.
Please.

Each day on which I became a mother anew....

Kids and grandparents